Hasidic Bar Mitzvah Clothing Checklist

I recently had my own version of the infamous Abbot and Costello script Who’s on First? But with a bit of a twist. I was receiving a lesson on Hasidic fashion and my sons’ upcoming new bar mitzvah clothing. Hasidic clothing is worn to show respect and honor to G-d, the Torah and each individual's identity as a Jew. And, much like the army has a dress code that unifies each individual to be a part of the group, Hasidim too have a dress code and it is chosen very purposefully to elevate each and every soul during every moment it is worn.  

There's a story of a Hasidic rabbi. He was once sitting on a subway. A Jewish woman, looked over at him and said, "You're the reason we have so much anti semitism. You dress so odd and its a disgrace." To which the man replied, "but I'm Amish." At that point the woman said, "Oh. I'm so sorry. We totally respect your ways."

Yet, this is all still foreign to me and so my own version of "Who's on First?" in regard to clothing went something like this:

(My husband started the conversation):

When we’re in NY, we will get what the boys need for their bar mitzvah: rekels, coats, bekishe, hats.”
“What’s a rekel?” (That’s me. I’m proud I know about the other items already but never heard of a rekel)

“You know the long coat I wear.”

“I thought that was a bekishe.”

“No. The bekishe is worn on Shabbos: a tish bekishe for the meal and a davening bekishe for davening.”

“Can’t they just have one bekishe? I’m mean they’re going to out grow it and there’s 2 of them and well…”
“No.”

“So what is the rekel for?”

“Davening on Shabbos and Yom Tov.”

“I thought that was the bekishe.”

“You get a rekel when you’re 12 and wear it on Shabbos and Yom Tom and then when you’re 13 you wear it during the week.”

“But they have school uniforms. How are they going to show up at school with a rekel?”

“They’ll wear the rekel during davening on top of their clothes.”

“What if its cold outside? Do they were their uniform, the rekel and a coat?”

“That’s a good point. Maybe we should also get them an overcoat?”

“How are they going to keep up with a rekel, a coat, book bag, lunch bag, and hat? And, what if it rains?”

“Well they can wear the other thing. I do have a 2^nd coat for during the week.”
“There’s another coat? What’s that one called?”

“It's called a chalak and it is very informal.  Usually only bochurim (unmarried) wear them.”

“Why do they need that?”
“It just gives them option if they don’t’ want to wear the rekel.”

“And who is keeping up with all this clothing?”

(I’m now visioning 8 coats around the house and “Mooooom!!! Where’s my rekel??!!!”)

“This is the norm for people in religious communities in Israel and NY.”

 “But we don’t live there. Can you explain all this again. I’m confused.”

 It was 11 PM and my brain was just not wrapping itself around 12 new pieces of clothing that were all black and practically looked the same.

 So my husband said, “Wait. I’ll show you.” He went to the closet and pulled out all the pieces of his religious wardrobe and showed me each piece. I was sort of catching on. He again explained the rekel, the bekishe and each piece (very patiently, I must admit). 

He knows I have “special needs.”

And I know, I'm going to be schelping a lot of black coats.

 Glossary:

Rekel:  a long black coat worn by Hasidic Jewish men during the workweek.

Bekishe: a long black coat worn by Hasidic Jewish men during Shabbos and Holidays.

Chalak: an informal house coat worn by unmarried Hasidic Jewish teenagers during the week.